Can I Get My Ish Together, Please?

March 17, 2017
“You still like eff boys!”
I was appalled. “I just think it’s selfish to meet a really nice guy right now and pull him into my mess. That’s what guys do to us. We meet them and they’re not ready.”
“That’s not always true. Maybe they thought they were.”
“Hell nah! They knew they weren’t ready. The problem is a few months in is when we realize they’re not ready and were never ready. Now we’re so invested we stay with them and hope we can make them become ready. What I’ve learned is you can’t make somebody a better version of themselves. They only can do that. So, is it wrong for me to dodge the so called “nice guy” while I get myself together? Nah, I don’t think so. I’m in the middle of a career change. I’m trying to find other activities and hobbies outside of vodka and tequila.”
She rolled her eyes, “You don’t think you’re cheating yourself out of a good relationship because you think you’re not ready?”
“No because I just think I’m in an awkward stage right now. I feel unbalanced. Real talk, I wish men would offer us this same courteous.”
She thought about it for a second. “Yeah, you right. A dude will have a baby on the way and still court you. He could have just literally broke up with his girlfriend an hour earlier and still get your number.”
I laughed, “Bih, he can still be with his girl and get your number! Like he can literally have just pulled out of her 15 minutes prior and get your number and say he’s single.”
We both busted into laughter.
I continued, “It’s not that I don’t want the nice guy, I just think I should watch a few more OWN’s SuperSoul Sundays and get my shit together. It’s selfish to knowingly go to somebody not 100%. Have we not learned that broken people just break other people?”
“I think you mean hurt people, hurt people.”
 I rolled my eyes. “You know what I mean. You should arrive whole to another person, that’s all I’m saying. Hell, at least 80%.”
We clinked our glasses, “Amen to that.”

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